****warning; while not graphic, this post includes birthing details and the word "cervix" !****
Presently, he has contracted the nasty virus our other children shared, so we are praying for his continued health and wellness. He just returned home from his first hospital stay, in fact. 24 hours, several deep suctioning treatments, and a diagnosis of RSV. But thankfully, no fever, nursing stable, good urine output, no oxygen assistance, and good vitals the entire time! Praise God for that! And praise God that his older siblings are all healing from the virus too, with minimal complications.
So 4 weeks ago, it was a mild Thursday morning. The sun was shining, the air chilly, as it often is just before Spring officially arrives. We loaded our minivan with the birthing-kit-in-a-box, my suitcase with after-birth clothing and the baby's things, and an infant car seat. We were full of anticipation, knowing that this day would likely bring a precious new life into our family. My weekly midwife appointment indicated labor was imminent, and at my request, my midwife would place prostoglandin gel on my cervix to kickstart things. On this morning, I was dilated to a solid 4, and my cervix was still thick, but very soft. This only works if a body is "ready" to go anyway, and is helpful for the parents-to-be in getting childcare lined out and avoiding sudden labor in the middle of the night! :) With our 4th child, we used this method of a "natural kickstart" and had her in our arms about 4 hours later!!
Just as it should, labor kicked in...whew! The contractions weren't terribly painful but they were strong and demanded I take notice. It was recommended we go for a walk, just to really push things into gear...so we did. And sure enough, the contractions strengthened! I was getting pretty excited with our progress and hopeful to have a precious little one delivered around lunchtime. I walked a bit more, pushing myself. We returned to the house so I could rest a few minutes as we geared up for the next level. And then an odd thing happened....my labor stopped. Just stopped. I started to pace the floor, and it eventually picked back up a bit. I did some squatting and I could really feel that! OUCH! Good, progress. Right?
Before long, it was time to fill the birthing tub, and, I got in. The relief was unbelievable! Sinking into the warm water, feeling my muscles relax one by one. Water brings such a soothing effect to laboring Moms; and it offers strength along with a sense of peace. At some point, I also had a popsicle...I don't remember if it was in the tub or not...but I love popsicles during labor. Another *must have* for me! Much to my dismay, despite continuing to squat a bit in the tub, my labor halted once again. I was at least 5 cm dilated...labor shouldn't be stopping!! This was my 5th baby; he should be practically falling out of there! The last thing I wanted to do was get out of the tub, but that is what I had to do...and then, I got dressed, and we went walking again. In no time at all, my contractions were so strong I had to bend over, and we returned to the house, as I feared having this baby in the street!
And then labor stopped. Again. One of my midwives suggested a massage with arnica oil; she found all those painful knots in my uterine muscles, and a few on my back too. It was a wonderful blessing and brought me relief...she was also hopeful that rubbing out some twists in my uterine muscles might help move things along. Indeed, I would have strong contractions for awhile, then they would stop. If I sat down, everything stopped. My water has had to be broken with all of my deliveries, usually taking two tries (strong sack??!!)...so my midwives decided to try this, but the sack didn't bulge during contractions, and the baby's head would float back up after a contraction, so we were not able to break it without presenting too much risk to our little one.
This was a new experience to me; labor #5 shouldn't start and stop; my body was ready. I could feel all the "signs". Some contractions were incredibly painful and took my breath away. Although it hadn't happened in previous labors, pain would shoot down my legs with contractions. I couldn't understand why the baby's head wasn't lodging into position and why labor kept stalling. Eventually, I made it to a good 6 cm dilated, and there was no turning back...but baby wasn't coming either.
I was pretty exhausted from constant walking or pacing. Lunchtime had come and gone, with no baby. I didn't eat, because I didn't want to get sick during labor. But by mid-afternoon, I was starving and wiped out. I wondered what was going on! I had planned to be napping with a newborn at this time!! My children were home with Grandma and Papa, anxious for news...I had told them we might be home by suppertime. (Mistake; do not promise a timeline when waiting for a baby to arrive!) And now, clearly, that wouldn't be the case. Discouragement set in, and, on top of hunger and exhaustion, I just wanted to go home and go to bed. But we all knew that being dilated to 6 meant the baby could come any time, if the contractions started back up. I didn't want him to be born in the car--nor did I want to drop off to sleep and wake up to hard labor!
I ate, and we tried some different positions and strong contractions would ensue, bringing tears to my eyes. But they would stop. I paced and paced the floors some more. My midwives decided to try breaking my water again; there was nothing left to try, and I was afraid to go home. We didn't have overnight childcare, and night was on the way. This time, the baby's head lodged enough to get a bulge in the bag...my midwife was able to break my water! I thought "praise God, this baby will be coming soon!" But then those strong contractions hit. And I wondered what I was thinking, in wanting to go through labor again!!
Back into the tub I went, this time, confident that all would go well. Sure enough, the contractions didn't stop, but the warm water didn't help too much...they were incredibly painful, and the pain shot down my legs. I knew it must be getting close, and I kept wondering why my midwives weren't telling me to push. I could feel the intense pain...my mind kept telling me it was "time". I remember asking what was happening; my one midwife quietly spoke phrases from the Bible to me, about strength, and asking God for help. The other encouraged me to focus on pushing with the pain. At this point, I was too exhausted to do much! I wanted to, but I had little strength left, after a long day of off-and-on labor and tons of pacing!
Once again, the last thing I wanted to do was get out of the tub, but I had to. I didn't understand why this baby wasn't coming!! We needed to try another position and I honestly didn't feel I could do it on my own. Within a few minutes, I was on the birthing "table" (set in a semi reclined position, so my head was raised). Searing pain tore through me with each contraction, and I remember yelling pretty loudly...everyone was telling me to push, to keep going, and I'm pretty sure I yelled back that I couldn't do it anymore. I was crying and yelling with each contraction, and my midwife said the head was here! Relief in a couple more pushes...or not. I had my husband on one side, and one of my midwives on the other, and for a moment there was silence in between contractions...my midwife said she needed me to focus, and for a split second, I could. She said they'd need to try manipulation...and I asked what she meant. It all became clear then; this little guy was FACE UP instead of face down. I realized they were going to try to turn him...I was out of strength, but I nodded anyway. One midwife held my leg--I wanted to, but I felt paralyzed--the other midwife reached in there, turned him, and he practically fell out. I don't even think I had to push again. I remember such huge, instant relief--having the baby out is always a relief, but this time, it was immense! Suddenly, almost before I realized what had happened (that he had come!), he was on my chest and I was holding this beautiful little boy covered in vernix (which would make amazing hand cream, if someone could bottle it up!) He was protesting rather loudly, but with the sweetest newborn cry.
The moment was captured on camera; the relief mixed with delight on my face as I smiled at him...his tiny body, fresh from the womb, his lungs breathing air for the first time. He was certainly the most beautiful sight (well, besides my other 4 babies!!)...I felt nothing buy joy; for several minutes, there was absolutely no pain (my reward for losing out on the waterbirth??). Just sheer joy in the birth of this amazing little creature.
Eventually, all of the "post birth" was finished up, I was cleaned up, and robed, and holding my clean, fresh little one, swaddled tightly and topped with one of those stretchy newborn caps, in blue. Ohhhh, those moments of meeting him. Seeing the little feet that had been kicking me, smelling his sweetness, and nuzzling his tiny head. It had been a long, hard day...a confusing labor experience, but it sure ended beautifully. Later we realized how blessed we truly were...some of the "sunny-side-up" babies end up in emergency C-section...others include back labor (my labor was intensely painful, but the pain shot down my legs instead of radiating through my lower back)...sometimes the babies are in distress, but Noah never was. We praise God for this, for His hand of protection over my and our baby...and for the wisdom God gave my midwives throughout the day. Although I had desired another water birth, I was thankful my midwife had me get out; they wouldn't have been able to check and see the baby's position otherwise...she jokingly said, later on, that if I hadn't left the tub, I'd still be in there!! It was a rough labor, and I'd expected an easier time for #5 (isn't that the way it *should* work??)...but now my son has his own unique birth story.
Although I haven't mentioned his part in all of this, my husband was there every step of the way! He walked with me, held my hand, jumped up to bring me water or popsicles, to help me in and out of the tub...whatever I needed. He offered constant support and encouragement and kept me company. He supplied food when it was time :) His voice was in my ears cheering me on, especially when it was really, truly "time"...I remember him saying (loudly, to be heard over my own screaming) that "his head is here! C'mon, you can do this, you've done it 4 times before..." I wouldn't want to give birth without this man at my side. He was the one-man camera crew too; and while I was well-cared for after the birth, he took advantage of the time my midwives spent helping me with the after-birth unpleasantness, and as a result, we have some great "first moments" shots--and--my son's arrival was announced on Facebook within seconds!
Likewise, my midwife Kathy, has delivered my 3rd and 4th babies, and she is wonderful! It is so reassuring to have her at my births. She had to take on the role of assistant midwife this time, to let the other midwife be "primary attending"...as a result, she was at my side, holding one of my hands. What a blessing! This time, I had a 2nd midwife with me, as she is working on obtaining her license. She is the dear lady who actually delivered my 5th child, and the brave soul who "reached in there and turned him!" She also offered the arnica oil massage, a beautiful gift she tries to present to each of her mothers.
The Bible says that Mary "pondered these things in her heart"...as with each of my birth memories, I ponder these things in my own heart. I try and recall the little details, I relive the birth moments in my mind...these memories are so precious; the moments of meeting our little babies, the moments of joy as they are born. A joy that literally erases the pain of labor, in an instant (usually!).
Noah Andrew was born March 4, 2010 at around 6pm. He weighed in a 7 pounds and 15 ounces, although he is now up to 10 pounds!!
1 comment:
That is a beautiful birth story! Thank you so much for sharing it.
Post a Comment