Thursday, August 30, 2007

Thursday's Thankful List

Another Thursday has come; time to consider all that which makes up my world and choose thankfulness in the midst of worries life brings. Today it is particularly challenging, for while there is no short of basic blessings; food, water, a home, a soft bed, showers, and so forth…it has still been an unusually trying week, with my husband’s schedule changes and various behavior issues we are working on in our little home. And I am so weary this week; from disturbed rest (late 2nd trimester changes, I’m sure!). We have completed only a bit of school today, but are taking a break to be outside.

This morning, my youngest (2) woke up at 5am. Yep, that’s right 5:00AM. Who knows why…but…she is still up. No nap yet, no rest…just energy. I’m thankful she isn’t whiny and crying as would typically be expected. She seems quite jovial today! But her Mama is tired and less jovial. My son was up at 6am, then our oldest at 7am. The older 2 needed a bit more rest I think, and so perhaps we will have early bedtimes tonight! And if I’m successful in this, then I will have another reason to be thankful! LOL.

I’m thankful to have completed a load of laundry, although I have much more to work on. J

I’m thankful that the weather has cooled, if only for today. There is still humidity in the air, and mosquitoes flying everywhere…but…we are enjoying a pleasant morning outdoors. Due to the heat, we haven’t been outside for morning playtime in awhile, so it’s good to have fresh air in our lungs and enjoy the sounds of nature. A cool breeze blows through every couple of minutes as well.

I’m thankful that the early signs of Fall are appearing (partly due to dryness, but appearing just the same!)…leaves are already falling from the trees, though not in great numbers yet. Our neighbor’s tree is slowly turning yellow, and the deep blue of the summertime sky is taking on a grayish hue reminiscent of cooler weather. The deep, dark green of our trees is fading every so slightly, in readiness for the changing colors ahead. And the coneflower has dried up now as well. Indeed, Fall is coming, slowly yet, but still on its way.

I’m thankful that my kids are healthy and (relatively) happy. I watch as they run about the yard, dig in the sandbox, and swing on our swingset. It may not last long, as inevitably a disagreement will erupt—but—for now, it is blissful to hear the sounds, and to see, even my youngest running around on her squatty toddler legs.

I’m thankful for the pumpkin patch my Dad planted, which we will enjoy in another month or two!

I’m thankful for the lovely little family celebration we had this week, for my baby’s 2nd birthday. Complete with my chocolate cake covered in chocolate frosting. Mmmmmmmmm.

I’m thankful to have my family; my children and my husband, however difficult this week is, and no matter how weary I become. I wouldn’t trade any of them, nor the little one growing inside me. Speaking of which, I am also grateful to feel her little kicks each day, as they grow stronger and stronger. A pleasant reminder of her existence in our lives.

Friday, August 24, 2007

Today is a delightfully overcast; the winds are blowing gray clouds to cover the pale blue in our late summer sky. I can hear the delicate clanging of my wind chime as it sways from its perch. We had a brief shower of rain this morning, but not enough to soak our grass…so I am (of course) hoping for more before the day is over. Crunchy granola bakes in my oven this afternoon, filling our home with its honey-cinnamon scent. It will be a lovely snack, with golden raisins and dried cranberries added to it, once it has cooled. It is these simple things I am thankful for, this week. J

We are in a period of adjustment, as my husband has just changed work locations (inconveniently and more expensively—to the other side of town!). Along with this, comes a great deal of hours changes as well. Not all a bad thing, as he will likely work a few less hours per week—but—we will all be adjusting to the changes, as he will work most evening hours now. And his days off will vary from week to week, including the addition of Sunday hours to his new schedule (but not every Sunday, thankfully). So, our week has been filled with discussion of these changes, and I haven’t figured out my new routine yet, with him home each morning. School has been hit and miss I’m afraid, but we should begin working towards normalcy next week. Amidst the disruption, I am thankful that he has a job, when many do not.

I am thankful that our home is dry, and not full of mud or flood-waters as are many homes in Oklahoma, Ohio, Wisconsin, and other areas recently ravaged by unforgiving rainfalls, mudslides, and so forth. The death count from these floods is nearly 30; what unexpected tragedies for these families. I am thankful that we are (for this moment) safe as we go about our lives. Only God knows what tonight will bring, what tomorrow will bring, and what our future holds. I am grateful that I can rest in His peace, knowing that whatever He allows, He will also give the grace to handle it. Easier said, than practiced, when times of trial come, isn’t it? The depth of our faith is revealed in fire.

Another thankful item…my fellow blogger and friend TaunaLen has generously offered me a "Nice Matters" award on her blogs. So sweet of her! Thank you, Tauna! I think I could easily award it to any of my favorite blogs! I am grateful for my friends in this xanga community, and also, for the many bloggers I find in other blogging communities. I am amazed at the wonderful ideas, recipes, hints, advice and information that I can read through, with only the light tap of my mousepad. Using bloglines, or another feed, I can group my favorite blogs together, and it is like putting together my own magazine, specifically tailored to my personal preferences for subject matter. I’m thankful for the few moments I have every day or two, to browse blogs, print new recipes, jot down new books to review, and generally be encouraged and inspired.

Monday, August 20, 2007

All in a Day of Teaching

Some days, it is the teacher who learns more than the student. Today, we (my daughter and I) began to work on Math again—after probably too much of a break from it (can you say ‘retention loss’?). In only a few minutes, my bright daughter was frustrated to the point of tears, as was her teacher (me). It’s not so much that she can’t remember her addition facts, it is more that she’s not trying to—even with prompting such as “count by 5s, honey!”. She is discouraged before we really even start! Quietly concerned, I sat down with my Ray’s Arithmetic books, and most importantly, the Teacher Guide to the series (written by well-respected Dr Ruth Beechick). I realized that I had not done enough review with my daughter, as we were learning—at least not as much as she needed to learn her facts more concretely. She had done well with visualization and so I had moved on…but…after a summer break, it is apparent that we will need to do a LOT of review before moving forward. And that’s okay…I’m still learning too. Math is not her strong subject and memorization is not her strength either. She simply excels in other areas. And, adding to the challenge, she hates worksheets and drill work! But gentle drill we must do; review, review, review. I’m not concerned; she will catch up when she’s ready, as long as we are diligently working at it.

Back to her tears…several minutes later she is expressing a ridiculous amount of frustration over problems that are not difficult, but do require effort. She is allowed to use manipulatives to figure her work, so there really shouldn’t be ANY frustration. Furthermore, there is still an inordinate amount of tears. “Maybe she’s tired,” I think. But this goes deeper than the words “settle down!” Gathering my patience and a much kinder voice, I follow her to her room where she has retreated to do her work in quiet. Asking a couple questions about her frustration yields large teardrops falling to her page of problems. I’m so glad I took time to stop and listen to my little girl. I quickly hear that her voice holds more hurt than anger. She calls herself ‘stupid’ and ‘bad at math’—well, she is bright (as are all children, in their own ways!) and barely starting 3rd grade is far too early to be considered ‘bad’ at any subject, much less math! I tell her this gently and we talk some more….

My little one puts on a strong front, and can be quite the “know-it-all” (dare I guess where she gets it?), but deep inside she has the same streak of sensitivity I have. It’s the kind that never lets on when something hurts us; we probably don’t even cry, maybe not for weeks and weeks. Until one day, something punches that hidden bubble, and it bursts. Turns out, while taking a roadtrip last Spring, with one of her playmates, they had played an oral math game. Very soon into the game, my daughter couldn’t answer the problems anymore. She was told firmly by her peer, that she wasn’t very good at math at all. Maybe a couple of other demeaning statements; not really so cruelly intended at all—just a kid saying what kids say. Well, this situation was never shared with us, her parents, in typical half-kid/half-preteen fashion. She is just beginning those years of maturing, at the young age of 8. So, anyway…the story comes out, through tears. Those thoughtless but very typical kid-to-kid remarks cut my little one deeply, adding to an insecurity she already had, just because math frustrates her and she knows she doesn’t “get it” easily. Unfortunately, these types of kid statements are made, not infrequently, by this friend, so we are careful with the time my daughter spends with her (and we continue to work with our girl on learning to have self-confidence no matter what others say, and on placing importance in what God thinks, not what others think, etc. She will toughen up as she grows, but I want the toughening to be healthy confidence, and not just a brick wall around her heart!) My young one goes on to say that the remarks hurt her, and so she quit telling others that math wasn’t her thing; she made sure to keep it a secret from everyone else. My Mother’s heart nearly broke…I wish I had probed more about her hatred of math a few months ago, and learned then, what I learned today. Her resistance to math work, is what led me to choose to take a break from it, and has also led to frustration on my part as well, when it became a discipline issue. I had no idea there was a deeper “heart” issue at stake.

I lied down on her bed, and had her come snuggle with me as we talked more about it, and talked about strengths and weaknesses, our feelings, developing confidence in ourselves and most importantly in who we are in God, etc. Several minutes later, she seemed better, and was able to calmly sit and finish her work. Using her manipulatives, but with no more tears, no more frustration, and the gentle reassurance from her Mom that she desperately needs, but which I have been too lax at offering (much to my own shame). She is now having a remarkably good day, and playing happily—although—I’m not sure how much more “school” will be completed. I think we may have both learned enough for today!

Times like this, I am so glad she is at home with me, to learn. Although I learned some lessons today myself—I surely did!—I also was able to love her as her Mother, and offer unqualified acceptance to her broken little heart. I was able to see past defiance and frustration and (finally) discover the heart issue at stake with this subject called “math”. I wish I had slowed down and taken more time weeks ago; displayed more patience and softness to my little girl. It is so easy to think of her as ‘half-grown’ because she is my oldest. But she is far from grown, and is still quite young and in need of help, more often than she likes to admit. I must learn to be sensitive to this; of course, children come to us in their own time, and there’s no guarantee that she would have shared her troubles back when it happened. But I hadn’t given her enough opportunity either. Children need to feel safe and loved and protected before they will open up; another lesson to remember!

My patience and diligence—as both her Mother and her Teacher—are crucial now, especially in math. We have much review to do, but she is young and we have plenty of time. There is no need to worry if she is keeping up with her peers; as long as we keep moving forward, she will catch up. One reason to homeschool, is for the sake of individuality—for the purpose of *not* forcing my children to fit into the “one-speed-fits-all” box that prevails in typical school systems. I will develop a plan which will mix the use of worksheets (I can custom-print my own), the use of colorful ‘review’ type workbooks (already own, thanks to sister-in-law cleaning out her bookshelves!), the use of oral work and flashcard games, and, my daughter’s favorite—computer games (free on internet)! I will be using a similar mix of activities to work with my son on the alphabet and phonics. And maybe, for his math as well. (Which explains our interest in setting up an older computer with the new parts necessary to have our kids use it for educational purposes). I believe, with our combined efforts (of both myself and my daughter), we can conquer her math fears and hopefully, build a general sense of confidence in her heart as well, as we review and learn.

Thursday, August 9, 2007

A thankful list on Thursday

I am thankful for the deluge of rain we had last night…at first, it just poured down solidly with the wind whipping. Fun to listen to…but then, it turned into continual roars of thunder (really loud!) and lightning forking across the sky. A real summertime thunderstorm.

I am also thankful that 2 of my 3 kids slept through it…even I had trouble sleeping. Eventually, it stopped, but then started awhile later. Ugh. Today I am extremely groggy. BUT, I’m still grateful for the moisture. We are in quite the heatwave around here (100s) and it has been dry, dry. I wish a cool front had come with the rain, but, in August, that is really a bit much to even hope for!!

Given my groggy and grumpy state this morning, I am exceedingly grateful for my large mug of tea. And for the bowl of ‘bulgur porridge’ I just made for my toddler and I. (Older kids have already made themselves their cereal!) I’m hoping that the nutrients will help kickstart my energy, as I have laundry waiting for me…and grumpy kids…and school…the list goes on!

I am thankful that September is just around the corner. While we may retain heated temperatures, by the end of September, we will be catching glimpses of Fall around here, and I can’t wait. Even as a homeschool Mom, I love “back-to-school” time. Our own home takes on a new rhythm; I take advantage of school supplies sales; we return to explore the zoo (in cooler temps!); the library is, once again, empty!! (I just remembered, I am planning a garage sale in late September—ugh—as much as I want to CLEAR OUT, the thought of all the work is exhausting right now!)

I am thankful for the ‘quiet time’ I had with my husband last night…listening to the rain, talking, relaxing.

I am thankful for the small box of ‘Yankee’ votive candles I have. Just the thing I need to scent up the kitchen! Ohhhh, and I can’t wait to begin using my favored autumnal scents—the spicy ones. Mmmm!

I am thankful my new little niece was born this week—with no complications, a perfect little angel—number 4 to her family (my younger brother). 2 boys, then 2 girls. We will get to meet her a little later this month, but my parents came home from a quick visit (the family lives out of town), just raving about the new, sweet Grandbaby. Number 12 for them.

I am thankful for the bag of ‘pepitas’ I picked up yesterday at Whole Foods—which—I can’t seem to stay out of! Yes, I chose ‘roasted and salted’. J They are a good snack, and are inexpensive! Pepitas (little green pumpkin seeds) are a bit different from our typical jack-o-lantern pumpkin seeds, and are available year round. They combine wonderfully with other trail mix ingredients, but are just as yummy on their own—or—with dried cranberries. I haven’t tried them with chocolate chips, but, mixture of ‘sweet-n-salty’ is a tried and true favorite, so that might be worth eating!

I am thankful for my children and my husband…some days I think I do an okay job caring for them—but—I am still aware of how short I fall, and the grace I need to get through my days!

I am eternally grateful for Our God we serve and trust, for His grace, and for the peace He offers to those who simply lean on Him.

Wednesday, August 8, 2007

News and a Starbucks Story

I’m starting off my blog with an incredibly important piece of news….are you ready? Peter Pan peanut butter will be on shelves again NEXT MONTH!!!!!!!! (Or maybe this month, depending on stores stocking the product…) For serious Peter Pan PB addicts, like myself, this is almost the best news of the summer. I am sooooo tired of Jif (no offense to my Jif-loving xangans). I’m ready for my 6 lb tub of Peter Pan PB (Sam’s). Yes, I bulk-buy PB and we actually use it. And no, I’m not worried about its safety—in fact, after the numerous plant inspections and extensive micro-cleaning and safety procedures, I figure Peter Pan is actually the SAFEST peanut butter around. LOL!

In other news, my husband and I are busy creating Starbucks addicts out of our children. We don’t go weekly or anything; maybe once a month or less (generally speaking, but when I’m given a “card”, then sometimes we get extra visits!). So anyway, if we can afford to, we buy a drink for our two older kids to split—like a frappucino or something. Trouble is, my toddler is now yelling for her fair share these days. She used to happily take a drink when we shared with her—and then hand the cup back. But now, she holds on tightly! Tonight, she and I were running a couple errands, and so I thought I’d grab a Starbucks while we were out. She took a very late nap today and so I expect to be up quite late tonight. My little monkey starts clapping as soon as we hit the Starbucks drive thru.  Isn’t that hilarious? Needless to say, I ordered a “Venti” drink (iced mocha, lite ice) and asked for an extra cup/lid/straw so I could share just a little bit with her. Kept her quite happy the rest of the ride. Her favorite thing to do, besides drinking it (and she does like to sip my hot coffee or hot tea, by the way) was to pull the straw OUT of the cup and lick off the whipped cream. Very cute, but also rather messy. She had cream and coffee droplets all over her face, her carseat, her dress, etc. Oh well. It could be an Mastercard commercial. Cost of gas to get to Starbucks? 50 cents. Cost of a venti Starbucks drink? 4 dollars. Cost of a box of wipes to clean up the mess? 3 dollars. Passing on a love of coffee to my toddler? Priceless. 

And now I’m off to chase my caffeine-laced child. Naw, she barely got a few sips…she was mostly interested in the cream. That’s my girl! But she really is busy running around and giggling, with no signs of slowing down yet. Ugh. It’s 20 till 10pm. I’m rather glad for the caffeine I had.