Tea with Anne

"No, indeed! The rosebud tea set! Well, what next? You know I never use that except for the minister or the Aids. You'll put down the old brown tea set. But you can open the little yellow crock of cherry preserves. It's time it was being used anyhow--I believe it's beginning to work. And you can cut some fruit cake and have some of the cookies and snaps."

"I can just imagine myself sitting down at the head of the table and pouring out the tea," said Anne, shutting her eyes ecstatically. "And asking Diana if she takes sugar! I know she doesn't but of course I'll ask her just as if I didn't know. And then pressing her to take another piece of fruit cake and another helping of preserves. Oh, Marilla, it's a wonderful sensation just to think of it. Can I take her into the spare room to lay off her hat when she comes? And then into the parlor to sit?" ~from "Anne of Green Gables" by L.M. Montgomery

Can you imagine a time when “tea” mattered? When company was celebrated? A time when cupboards were accented with treasured preserves, cakes, and cookies, just waiting for tea with a special guest. I would love to visit “that time”. A place of beauty to be cherished, of joy in the simple moments, of life slow enough to stop for tea time…and Anne would be just the person to have tea with! Green Gables, just the place!

My oldest daughter is 10, and nearly old enough to enjoy the entire series of Anne books; my much-loved and oft-read paperbacks are waiting in a box; I look forward to passing them down. It is my hope that the magical stories so beautifully composed, will inspire imagination and a sense of “that time and place” for my daughter when she reads them one day.

I don’t live on Prince Edward Island…I don’t have a breathtaking farm like Green Gables. But I do have a tea set with roses on it! And I try to keep something freshly baked on hand, “just in case”. I have cherry preserves in the pantry, too! I believe it’s worth some effort, when possible, to be ready for impromptu tea parties with company. Anyone coming for tea? But when no one rings the bell, it is just as worthwhile to set the table with my beloved children and show them that, despite my impatience, my tone of voice, and whatever-else-I-might-have-failed-at-today…I love them, and they are worth taking time for tea and even using the fine china tea set.

Maybe that’s what I’ll do tomorrow, to brighten up our Monday. Make scones…and have tea.

Community online comes together for Cora!

If Cora McClenahan's story has touched you, consider helping build a memorial playground in her honor; you can donate directly--or--SHOP AT ETSY!! Lots of darling things so generously contributed by the Etsy community. Just click on the sidebar button.

If you want to support Cora's family by adding a button to your blog, go here. Believe me, if I can add the widget, so can you! :D

Please keep this sweet family in your prayers....

I am so amazed at the response the online community--bloggers and Etsy shopkeepers--have had for Cora's family. Even the number of comments on their blog shows a multitude of prayers supporting them right now, and carries a few other tragic stories that brave Mamas shared, in an effort to bond with Cora's Mama during this time. It truly is an example of "bearing one another's burdens" and of lifting our brothers and sisters in the Lord up...this is what the Church should be about. Love.

"But the angel said to her 'Do not be afraid, Mary, you have found favor with God.'" Luke 1:30

Wow. What an amazing statement...who among us, wouldn't like to find favor with God? Yet, what did that favor bestow upon her? She carried, birthed, nursed, and loved Our Savior, Jesus the Christ. Those were the good years, full of special memories, undoubtedly. In fact, after the visit from the shepherds and angels following Jesus' birth, Luke 2:19 tells us that "Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart." She didn't make a scrapbook full of pretty papers and stickers and photographs, as so many of us do today...but you can bet she had a scrapbook in her heart.

I wonder, though, how special and favored Mary felt, years later, as she watched crowds love and accept Jesus, and then turn on him? As Jewish leaders ridiculed him? And then, finally, as she watched her precious son--whom she had cradled in her arms, followed around as a toddler, and proudly watched as he grew--be crucified...a horrible, vicious death? How many of us would desire that end for our children? How many of us could stand by and watch our children tortured in such a manner? See him or her betrayed, sold, and killed for that which has not yet been fulfilled? Talk about faith! I remember the scenes in Mel Gibson's "The Passion of the Christ" movie, in which Mary weeps silently, watching her son and her Lord be crucified...then she mops up his precious blood...and followed the crowds to where he hung, uncovered and alone, on a Cross. At that moment, I realized what it meant, for Mary to have found favor in God's eyes.

Yet now, a couple thousand years later, Mary is praised often, for her service to God. For being the blessed Mother of Jesus. Her willingness to be used of God required an immense sacrifice, and through that sacrifice, God saved all of mankind. We are redeemed by Jesus' blood; blood that flowed from her veins to Our Christ's. But it was, for all its glory, a harsh reality for a Mother to face.

I wonder, what would I do, if God required such a sacrifice of me? How favored would I feel? Now, in a moment when my world is right, it is easy to say that I desire to be used for His glory. Sure...that whole eternal perspective thing. Whatever God desires. Because, after all, I am His. All that He has given me, is His. My husband, my children. But then, I am a Mother. I have a Mother's heart. Could I give up one of my precious children? Or all of them, as some have, for the sake of bringing glory to God?

It is easy to desire glory for God, when all is well. But can it be well with my soul, in the midst of a storm? In the darkness that has no light? I watch, in total amazement and admiration, as others are forced to choose Christ, even when He finds favor with them, and thereby chooses to use them for His glory...and that often calls for a great, great sacrifice. Pain I can't imagine. They are living through such a trial right now. I pray I would have such courage, in the midst of such tragedy....

My Grandmother Black used to tell my mother, growing up, that God gives us our ticket when it's time to ride the train. My Mother taught the phrase to me, and the hard way, I learned its meaning time and time again. We do not have the grace to walk where others walk...God gives us the grace to walk the path He sets before us. And He gives us that grace when we need it, and not before. I can look at tragedy and think "I couldn't live through that..." and maybe I couldn't. But if God calls me to, then I must walk in faith and accept the grace He gives me, when He gives it to me, so that I will be found faithful.

Some things make no sense, they have no answers this side of heaven. But we do not see the future, and we do not know the reasons for God's choices. We do not see what He sees. It is great peace, then, to know and trust the One who can indeed see the past, present, and future. He alone knows what will bring glory to His Name, and what will be best for us. These lessons sometimes come at a great price. As does His favor. Yet for He Who has given all, what else could we do? For He Who owns all, what else could we give, but ourselves and our lives?

Please keep praying for the McClenahan's. And for their close friends and family; this loss of little Cora is felt keenly by all, and she leaves a hole in the lives of all who knew and loved her, in addition to her own young parents. Even now, days later, this family and their great ache remains on my heart and in my prayers. It is unforgettable, this story. And it happens to many, across the country, I know. Precious babies in Heaven.

On my mind this week

Sometimes, my weeks get reaaalllllllllly long. Usually this happens when my husband is working longer-than-usual hours :) We homeschool, and simply being at home, all day, with 4 children, can get challenging. As if the housework, laundry, cooking, and school weren't enough, there is the individual personalities, the behavior issues that pop up, the attitudes needing checked, the chores to supervise...and that's just when everyone has slept reasonably well...the normal stuff!

I find that I regularly pray for more patience because I know I need it. More than ever! I desire to be a Mom who can remain in control when situations feel out-of-control. I desire to keep an atmosphere of peace in our home, a place where we can be nourished physically, mentally, and spiritually. The last year and a half or so, has brought our family some new challenges as children change and grow and mature, and, the addition of our precious baby, now one. Also a change of direction (and therefore, a new company) for my husband's career, and adding our son to the homeschooling roster.

And then I read about Cora, here: http://themcclenahans.blogspot.com. My only connection, is that her Grandfather was a favorite teacher and I graduated from the same high school as Cora's Dad (but many years prior!). It's a small, Christian, rural high school, located in a tiny town, kind out in the middle of nowhere. Many families have multiple generations who attend there, and there's a camaraderie among alumni. So, anyway, Cora's story touched my heart deeply. As a Mother, how could I not be touched? To read about an 11-month-old who goes to the Doctor for an ear infection, but instead, stage 4 neuroblastoma (cancer) is discovered. And about 2 weeks later, after multiple surgeries she bravely battled, her fight on earth is over. She is now cancer free, but in Heaven. What a hole she must leave in her young parents' life and home! Cora was a beautifuly, chubby baby, on the verge of her 1st birthday...her smile is contagious, her eyes sparkly...I have no doubt that this baby lit up her little world. There are no words of wisdom, no comfort I can offer...but this story has kept me in prayer throughout my days lately. Even now, I pray for her grieving family, marveling at their unshaken faith in our Lord, even in such a tragic trial. I pray that God will restore to them the joy that only He can give...I pray that God surrounds them with His own presence, and that of friends who will carry them through these dark days.

And I pray for our home. I pray that I can be the Mother He desires me to be. I thank Him for the health He has thus-far blessed us with. I hold my baby, only 3 months older than little Cora, and I thank God that she is here. I kiss her again and again, I watch her toddle around, cheering her on, and painfully aware of the blessing such moments are. For somewhere, not too far away, a mother is now longing for such simple moments.

While we must live our lives, while my life moves on...I pray that I will remember life is sacred. Life is precious. These moments cannot be taken for granted; we do not know at what point they will end. Baby Cora's first Christmas was also her last...and yet no one would ever have guessed. She won't walk here on earth, she won't celebrate her first birthday with her parents. Sometimes, a life ends with a suddeness that takes my breath away. I am thankful she is in Heaven with Jesus, hopefully playing with other children, their innocence eternally preserved. I am certain that angels hold her hands...sometimes handing her to Mothers or Grandmothers who have also left behind that which they held dear on earth.

I ache for a young Mother I've never met. I pray for their home, now unbearably quiet. And I treasure my daily moments a little bit more. I hold my baby a little bit tighter. And I thank God a few more times.

Tables

Tables. I love tables. Living takes place at tables. We gather at a table to eat, to nourish our bodies and our spirits (except for those dinner hours in which a 3-year-old attempts to climb on the table, or say, the ones in which a 1-year-old throws food from her high chair perch…these do not nourish spirits very well at all!). We sit at the table with our laptops. Perhaps with pen and paper. We journal, write letters or type emails, spend time in Bible study…we play games, celebrate holidays, light Advent candles. Much happens at the table. My daughter (10) draws endlessly, and creates stories…at the table. Another daughter (the afore-mentioned 3-year-old) brings her collection of tiny toys to the table to play. My son (7) drives his cars across the table (which accounts for the scratches and tiny dents from the car crashes). My almost-toddling 1-year-old reaches as high as she can, to hold the table edge as she walks along…or, she strains to reach some prize she has spied, and to pull it off its tabletop perch. From my table, I plan our menus, plan our days, plan our school. Some mornings, after a particularly sleepless night, I sit and sip tea, begging my body to wake fully; I may deeply desire sleep, yet I must begin our day instead. And it begins here, at the table.

We still own “our first table”. Actually, it was *my* first table; purchased for my first apartment. An antique oak table. It had been refinished when I bought it, but its surface is now fairly marred from many meals, many playtimes, many…many…many-everything-we-do-at-the-table activities. I still love it though. It is almost square when closed, but includes 2 leaves which lengthen it considerably. This does me little good, for I only have the 4 chairs it came with! I remember setting this table with the linens we received at our wedding. Arranging silk flowers in a crystal vase, for the table’s centerpiece. Setting the table with our wedding china, on our first few Anniversaries.

Then babies began to arrive, and we were ever-thankful! Along with them, another 2nd-hand table, this one with 6 chairs, and a more sturdy center! But that center is quickly falling victim to the “living” as well. And so our first table went to the garage for awhile. It appeared again, in the playroom, awhile back, which hastened some minor destruction to its surface. L And I recently decided that I should move it to a safer place. Yet I didn’t want to return it to storage. After all, can a house have too many tables? I think not!

I’ve noticed that in a room, it is easy to gather at the table. A place for your drink, your elbows, your paperwork, your toys, your snack, your game…and in our home, the table is frequently used. We are outgrowing our house, but moving is not an option, and so we must look at our space and our family, and make the space work for us, for the way we live. As I've watched our family, I noticed, we use tables! I could almost set a goal of having a table in every room.

So anyway, my children were systematically destroying that beloved “first table” I mentioned, because it was down in the playroom. Although I like having a table down there, I didn't like my favored table being destroyed! And, the room is small, and narrow...so I'll have to figure out something else. Our table now has a new space, and it is already well-received in that new place. In front of the living room windows, I placed this table. The afternoon sun pours across it’s surface; soon a bird feeder will be hanging just outside the window. I hope that our children can watch birds, sketch them, or simply learn about them, as they sit at this table. We have bird guides, bird sticker books, and Nature Journals. Just waiting for the opportunity to be used. A small basket of card games sits on the table, waiting to be played. Another basket holding our Art book and materials is nearby. Along with a vinyl tablecloth.

Sometimes a small change can breathe new life into a room. If you doubt this, simply add a table. And see what happens.

Has it really been so long since I have written a blog post? Indeed, it has. I barely have time to check email...jump on Facebook for a moment, and glance through my Google Reader list to see if any blog titles are relevant. Within a few moments, a child needs me, a nursing baby needs me, laundry calls, dishes await, or it's time to make lunch or start dinner. Late at night, when my house is finally quiet, I'm too tired to type. Or I have those emails to return. Or a sleeping baby wakes. If I'm lucky, my husband and I have an hour or two we can spend together a couple evenings a week. So life overtakes blogging, as it should. Living must come before writing about living, right? Not to forget, homeschooling! And so, my blog waits for me...because life will not.

lessons from an amazon order

I love Amazon. I really do. I get great deals, free shipping (I hold orders till I qualify), keep wish lists…and I like the 1-click ordering. Until today. I used 1-click, and discovered that this feature didn’t save my settings, and so, I didn’t get the “Super Saver Shipping” I qualified for. And now, of course, it’s too late as the orders have shipped. Hmmmm, I wondered how they were shipping SO FAST! Like, the same day I placed the orders!

Unhappily, I called them. Because, I’m a regular customer, and I don’t think I should be penalized for taking advantage of their convenient 1-click. Turns out, I have to go in and select the Saver shipping option each time I use 1-click. I probably won’t use that again! I selected Saver shipping last time, and forgot to do it this time--or--maybe I subconsciously assumed the settings were saved in my 1-click account options. Whatever the case, I’m having to shell out $10 for shipping. Ugh. But the guy credited my account $5, to make up for it. Technically, however misleading their site may be, it was still my fault, so, that was a nice gesture towards keeping me happy. :D

While I was on the phone, I was tempted to be nasty…to throw a good ol’ American fit, because, I knew that I’d get all the shipping knocked off, if I did. And to make matters worse, I could barely understand the gentleman I was speaking with--because--my call was shipped overseas. I was tempted to disgustedly ask for another person, a supervisor perhaps…have you been there? Felt that way? Because, I am angry that our customer service calls are shipped overseas. For Dell, for Avon, for Amazon, and countless other companies. So when the call began, I wasn’t very friendly. My voice had an edge to it; you know the one “Don’t mess with me because I’m not happy you are answering this call and you can barely speak English and I can’t understand you at all, and I’m not happy with the company you represent anyway…and…” Yeah, you get the idea.

But I realized something. First, he is doing his job; it isn’t his fault the companies ship our calls over there and give American jobs away. I understand why…unions, pay scales, benefits, the list goes on…but still, an American company ought to use American employees, right? Anyway…so, he was doing his job. Trying to speak English as best as he was able. And I was representing America. Do I want his view of Americans to be that we are snotty, rude, self-righteous, and demanding? If that is what he gets, when he answers American customer service calls, then that will be his view of Americans. We, as Americans, should still be respectful, and kind in our dealings with these foreigners. We may be the only Americans they “meet”, if only over the telephone.

Furthermore, in order to determine my order, he read through a few of my book titles. Guess what one of them was? Yep. “The Daily Life of Jesus.” If he thought for an instant, that I was a Christian, then I wouldn’t want to blow it. I don’t want to be rude while I am wearing Christ’s name. I would hate for the guy to think what I’ve often thought, which is “wow, what a way for a Christian to behave. (That person) gives us all a bad name!” Have you ever thought that?
So I calmed down, tried to respectfully ask him to repeat himself to me…thanked him for his time…wished him a nice day. But I regret that I didn’t start off the conversation with a kinder tone of voice. We never know what affect we have on others, but we need to remember the names we wear. Our name in Christ, our name as Americans, and our family name as well. These 3 affect us in our lifetime, but may have eternal significance as well…and certainly, they affect the generation of children we are raising in our homes. What will we leave to them, by leaving them our names--our legacy?

Might not be a bad idea to remember to speak more patiently with that “next generation I’m raising”…while I’m at it. And with the people I come into contact with in my daily interactions at local stores, restaurants, whatever the case. In fact, the same thought occurred to me last time I wore a T-shirt with our church name on it. I was representing our church as I wore it…what did my words and actions say?

Yep, something to think about.